May 2013
ragazzzo:
it’s the year 3056, a mother rocks her baby to sleep with an ancient lullaby titled “shake that ass” by mystikal
morristibbs:
IF SOMEONE IS SCARED OF SPIDERS OR BUGS DONT FUCKING PICK ONE UP AND WALK TOWARDS THEM WITH IT YOU ARENT FUCKING FUNNY YOU’RE A GODDAMN ASSHOLE
emporbooty:
gamblingemperor:
emporbooty:
gamblingemperor:
1324 FOLLOWERS IM LAUGHING SO HARD ITS IN ORDER
1324 is not in order Matt
ITS 2 AM AND IM NOT EVEN GOOD AT SCIENCE IN THE FIRST PLACE
Science
Me First Having a Tumblr: I will never reblog a photo more than once.
Now: Reblogging the 83rd time because of perfection
hungarian:
it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
3 tags
Follow me on IG
@_xogeli
Dear Yahoo!,
dankickedphilsstickz:
We know you bought Tumblr, we know there is nothing we can do about it now, but we only request one thing.
Please, PLEASE do NOT ALLOW FUCKING CHILDREN ON THIS WEBSITE DO NOT MAKE IT FAMILY FRIENDLY, OKAY? THIS IS THE PLACE WHERE WE CAN SHIP AND READ ALL THE GAY SMUT WITHOUT FEELING BAD OR GUILTY AND NOT TO MENTION, THE ONLY PLACE WE DO NOT GET JUDGED BY IT. PLEASE DON’T...
jwisser:
thepasta-nerada:
vvrathia:
the sexual tension when u and ur crush are online on fb at the same time and u just stare at their lil green dot
and suddenly you know what gatsby felt like
This is actually the most profound and appropriate literary allusion I’ve encountered so far this week.
jesussbabymomma:
DOES ANYONE ELSE MAKE SCENARIOS IN THEIR HEAD OF THEM DATING SOMEONE AND HAVING THE PERFECT RELATIONSHIP AND DOING CUTE COUPLE THINGS WITH THAT PERSON BECAUSE ME 24/7
android18:
meanwhile at tumblr headquarters
shoutout to my boyfriend in the hospital with a severe case of non existence
Same nigga that you knew way back when
thcelebi:
You actin’ like it’s somebody you don’t know Tell me how the fuck we supposed to stay friends When you got a bunch of feelings that you don’t show I can tell, I can tell, I can tell certain people don’t like me no more New shit don’t excite me no more Guess’in they don’t really make ‘em like me no more Uh, you can look me in my eyes and see I ain’t myself ‘Cause if ya what I created...
